Hear Me
by zippersful
Summary: Ryan knew cemetarys were supposed to be depressing, so how come when he visited this one he always felt better?
1. Hear Me

**HEAR ME**

**By Unsafety Pin**

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_You gotta be out there_

_You gotta be somewhere_

_Wherever you are_

_I'm waiting..._

Ryan stared listlessly out the windshield as the rain beat down. His thoughts came back to the tiny one way road ahead of him. He had come all the way here, would he chicken out now? It had been so long, and he needed to clear his mind. He was 18, this shouldn't be a problem.

_'Cause there are these nights when_

_I sing myself to sleep_

_And I'm hoping my dreams _

_Bring you close to me_

_Are you listening?_

The question rang in his head. Was she listening? Would she? Of course, she always did. Ryan contemplated whey he was here. Was he scared? Was he worried what she would think? His heart started to beat faster as he reached for the car door handle.

_Hear me I'm crying out_

_I'm ready now_

_Turn my world upside down_

_Find me_

Inside his head, he could her what she might say to him, being afraid of talking to her. Ryan stepped into the drizzle the storm had become. His boots seeped into the fresh mud with each step he took. He knew cemetarys are supposed to be depressing, so how come when he visited this one he always felt better?

_I'm lost inside this crowd_

_It's getting loud_

_I need you to see me_

_I'm screaming for you to please_

_hear me_

_Can you hear me?_

Ryan rounded the tiny path to her stone. It had been 3 years ago that they placed her here. Annabella Marie, his sister. He was her baby brother, they had looked out for each other even when they thought there was no where more to look. He studied the engravings a bit more, noticing the fine detail. He wished he would have seen the signs. Ryan kneeled down, testing the softness of the ground beneath him. The rain started to hit harder, and soon it enveloped him in a sheet of rain. Deciding the hell with it, he sat down and leaned his back against the grave stone.

_I used to be scared of_

_letting someone in _

_but it gets so lonely_

_being on my own_

_with no one to talk to and_

_no one to hold me_

_I'm not always strong_

_I need you here_

_Are you listening?_

The years flashed through his mind, some moments sticking out more than others. Annabella cutting her long brownish blonde hair and donating it to Locks of Love, a charity that makes wigs for children with cancer. The day she got her driver's license and took him for ice cream; he was twelve. The day he looked at her and noticed her sunken cheek bones and how tight her skin looked on her arms. The day...

Ryan bit his lip to stop the tears. He didn't come here to cry to her, how sorry he was for letting it happen. He needed to clear his head, not place more guilt on his shoulders. He cleared his throat.

"Hey Annabella." The sun peeked through the clouds to shine. "Happy birthday."

Ryan shifted his position, grimacing at the mud beneath him. He could almost hear her laughing. He had been 15 when she died, she 19. Died. Ryan thought it was more like murder.

_I'm restless and wild_

_I fall but I try_

_I need someone to understand _

_(Can you hear me?)_

_I'm lost in my thoughts_

_And I've fought_

_For all that I've got_

_Can you hear me?_

Unlike Ryan and Trey, Annabella had a different father, but she might as well of had none at all. Maybe she would still be here, Ryan thought to himself. His mother's boyfriends had all called her ugly and fat, unfit to live in the same space. Annabella stopped eating, purposely working long hours to advoid the subject of food. Her brothers were said to be her responsibility, anything they did came down upon her. Ryan tried to be good, but Trey always blamed things on him, but that didn't matter. Annabella would always take the pain for them. Trey treated her like dirt, like she was there to take his punishments. She was beautiful, beautiful blue green eyes, beautiful golden skin, beautiful golden streaked brown hair.

She said that one day, when she's graduated from college and had her own house, on the beach of course, she'd take him from this place and show him that a house isn't supposed to be like this. That he won't have to worry about breathing too loud, or getting beat because he spilled his drink. Annabella didn't deserve the treatment that she got.

_-------_

_ He was 15. Ryan slammed the door shut, or rather, tried to. The force caused the door to bounce off the shabby wood frame, not to mention catch another's attention. His mother's boyfriend's shady eyes met his, along with a rough fist._

_ "Don't you ever slam that door again, you hear me?!" The boyfriend cracked his knuckles._

_ Ryan stood silent, eyes to the worn floor. His face stung. It was then that the door clicked shut behind him. Annabella was home. Ryan looked behind him. The fierce protectiveness was ever present in her green eyes._

_ "And where do you think you've been? You was supposed to have dinner ready by the time I got home." His breath reeked of alcohol._

_ "I've been at school, and if you weren't so drunk off your ass all the time, you'd know that!" Annabella raised her voice, something she wouldn't regret, but Ryan would. Annabella stepped in front of him, plowing on. "Unlike you, I plan on doing something with my life other than mooching off someone else and beating on kids!"_

_ Ryan believed there would have been more to come, had the rough fist not been raised again. And again. He blinked, and suddenly the boyfriend wasn't standing anymore. Neither was Annabella. A surge of panic swept Ryan, not for the boyfriend, but for Annabella. She was sprawled on the floor behind him, hand prints decorating for delicate face. Ryan dropped to his knees beside her._

_ "Annabella?" He took her head into his lap. " 'Bella? Hey..."_

_ A soft string of coarse language floated to his ears. "...dead...fucking dead" Ryan moved a piece of hair from her face. "...'Bella my ass...hate that." She moved to get up, setting her arms behind her for balance. She lightly touched her face._

_ "Son of a bitch..." Annabella came to her feet. She looked around for her "mother's" boyfriend, and found him out cold on the floor. She cocked an eyebrow at her brother, knowing the answer without asking the question. If Ryan would have known that this moment would lead to the undoing, he would have grabbed Annabella and ran as fast as his legs would have carried him._

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Continue on? I've definately got more to write, that is, if it wants to be heard! hint hint Leave a review!


	2. Broadway

Hear Me

.chapter two. broadway.

unsafety pin

Last chapter: _"Son of a bitch..." Annabella came to her feet. She looked around for her "mother's" boyfriend, and found him out cold on the floor. She cocked an eyebrow at her brother, knowing the answer without asking the question. If Ryan would have known that this moment would lead to the undoing, he would have grabbed Annabella and ran as fast as his legs would have carried him._

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_ Ryan and Annabella stayed the night at a friend's place. A black and blue mark was prevalent on her face. Ryan woke up to find her in the bathroom, reverently packing on the cover-up._

_ "What'dya think?" Annabella looked in the mirror. _

_ Ryan gave her the "you-don't-deserve-this-and-I'm-going-to-kick-his-ass" look._

Broadway is dark tonight  
A little bit weaker than you used to be  
Broadway is dark tonight  
See the young man sitting  
In the old man's bar  
Waiting for his turn to die

_ Annabella knew this look, and quite well. "You know, you-"_

_ "I know, I know." Ryan cut her off sharply. "ButI can't let this keep happening."_

_ "Ryan, " She turned away from the mirror. "Soon we won't have to deal with this, with mom, or her stupid 'boyfriends'."_

_ "And what if soon isn't soon enough?_

_ "Ryan..."_

_ "No! What if next time..." Ryan stopped, realizing he was now yelling, and that Annabella had that look in her eye...the look she had during the 'incidents'. He put his hands on her shoulders. "What if next time...is the last time? What am I supposed to do then?"_

_ Annabella patted Ryan on the head._

_ "I will be fine. However," She reached for the bathroom light." You, my dearest, blue eyed brother, did you study for that test in history today?" She walked out and down the hallway._

_-------_

_The cowboy kills the rock star  
And Friday night's gone too far  
The dim light hides the years  
On all the faded girls_

The rain had gone back to a drizzle. The mud was already caked and soaking through Ryan's jeans. The coldness of the stone had seeped deeper into his bones. Well, Ryan thought to himself, it was raining just like this...

-------

_ Ryan ran inside; it was raining. He heard a thump from somewhere farther inside the house. Cautiously, he moved toward the sound. His mother's boyfriend was rummaging through the tiny room that Annabella occupied._

_ "What do you think you're doing?!" Ryan's voice boomed off the walls._

_ "She's got it!" A drawer was flung unto the bed. Dirty hands ran though it all." Where the fuck is it?!"_

_ "What are you talking about? Stop it! None of that is yours to touch!" Ryan reached for his grubby hands. The boyfriend smacked him away._

_ "Where is it? Where is that fat ass bitch sister of yours keeping it? Where's the money?!" The boyfriend grabbed ahold of Ryan's shoulders and shook._

_ "You son of a bitch! Stop it!" Annabella appeared in the doorway. She was now bony thin and pale._

_ "Tell me where it is!!" The boyfriend let go of Ryan, reaching instead for Annabella's purse. Annabella screeched and smacked him across the face with it. Ryan couldn't, _didn't_, react fast enough._

Forgotten but not gone  
You drink it off your mind  
You talk about the world  
Like it's someplace that you've been

_ The boyfriend power housed Annabella in the face, knocking her against the doorway and finally the floor. Ryan will always remember that sound, the sound of his sister's murder. Adrenaline pulsed through each and every cell of his being. He jumped on the boyfriend, pulling him mid-pounce from his sister, and pummeled him until he didn't move. Ryan slid over to his sister._

_ "Annabella..." He smoothed her hair from her face. Ryan reached to pull her head to his lap. Sticky. Warm. Ryan pulled his hand away. Red. He shook her shoulder. "Annabella!"_

_ Her head lolled to the side. Blood freely oozed down from a gash by her temple. Ryan put his head to her chest. He struggled to hear the beats. He sprang up for the phone. Phone? Dead; no answer. Didn't pay the bill. Ryan burst out the front door, screaming to anyone that would hear him._

You see you'd love to run home  
But you know you ain't got one  
And you're livin' in a world  
That you're best forgotten around here

_ Ryan watched from the swinging ER room doors. A team flurried around Annabella, sticking her with things he couldn't pronounce. 'Bella wouldn't have liked that, she was terrified of needles._

_ "'I'm sorry, but if I was supposed to be stabbed with foreign objects like that, I would have been born with a "stab here" spot. Last time I checked, not there!'" _

_ Annabella's frail body jerked on the stretcher. Ryan looked away. He stared at his fists, marred and bloody. After a neighbor had called an ambulance, he had gone back inside. Ryan took another look at Annabella and gave her a gentle kiss on her forehead before returning to the boyfriend._

_ "If she dies, so will you." His voice was ice cold. The boyfriend groaned from his spot on the floor._

_ "You think so, you little shit..." The boyfriend choked it out._

_ "Yeah, I do." Ryan sucker punched him as he tried to get up. And he did it again. Again. Again. And again until he could hear someone pounding on his door. The boyfriend no longer had a face._

_ Ryan sprinted to the door. It was a blur from the paramedics to where he was now. He could hear the beep go solid. Ryan slid to the floor, his emotions finally spilling over. He pounded his fists into his eyes, his grief overcoming him. Why? Why why why why why...over and over again that's all he thought until it became jumbled...why why yhwywhywyhwy. Ryan bent over, resting his forehead on the cold tiled floor. He rammed his fists into anything that could take the pain away._

_ Someone came running down the hall; he could hear the furious pounding on the floor. They grabbed his arms. His cry echoed in the hallway._

Broadway is dark tonight  
A little bit weaker than you used to be  
Broadway is dark tonight  
See the young man sitting  
In the old man's bar  
Waiting for his turn to die

_ They let him in to see her._

_ "I got him, Annabella." Ryan ran his fingers over her forehead. He whispered. "I got him..."_

_ Ryan ran the sleeve of his shirt under his nose. " I know, I shouldn't do that."_

_ He didn't want to tell her that mom wasn't here, that no one had come. His mother's only daughter was lying here, dead, and she couldn't bother to come. Ryan felt the breakdown starting to form._

_------_

_You choke down all your anger  
Forget your only son  
You pray to statues when you sober up for fun  
Your anger don't impress me  
The world slapped in your face  
It always rains like hell on the losers day parade _

Ryan fidgeted. The rain had nearly stopped. His mother had barely showed up on time for the funeral. Ryan was left to deal with everything. The school had a fundraiser for Annabella, to make sure she was buried with the dignity and respect that she earned but never saw. He had tried to find her father, but apparently the reason he wasn't around was because he was deceased. He wished he could say the same for his father.

_You see you'd love to run home  
But you know you ain't got one  
'Cause you're livin' in a world that you're best forgotten  
And when you're thinkin' of a joke  
And nobody's gonna listen  
To the one small point  
I know they been missin' round here _

No home. Without Annabella, would he end up like his mother? No, Ryan thought to himself, she would kick his ass if he just gave up. He decided he would study harder, stay out of trouble. He would be something. Ryan thought about what the doctors had said to him about Annabella; 'Her body was too weak to withstand what happened to her. If she hadn't been so malnourished, her chances of survival would have been so much better. Did you know that she was starving herself?'. Those words rattled in his head. Murder. The boyfriend killed her. And Ryan kept to his word.

_Broadway is dark tonight  
A little bit weaker than you used to be  
Broadway is dark tonight  
See the young man sitting  
In the old man's bar  
Waiting for his turn to die _

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Like: Yes or No? Song is "Broadway" by the Goo Goo Dolls. Good band. The song in the first chapter is "Hear Me" by Kelly Clarkson.


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